Tuesday, May 5, 2009

1980's Toybox:The good, the bad and the creepy


Teddy Ruxpin was a bear who told stories to kids whose parents were out partying in the 80s and couldn't be bothered to tuck their kids in bed. The bear had a cassette player in his back and his mouth and eyes moved when he told the story. I imagine many kids were scared of him the way they were scared of chucky. I could see this bear coming to live and causing some damage. I was going to describe some horrific scene, but this site is called Sprinkles and Puffballs for pete's sake.
Fuckin Lite Brite. Those pegs were all around my house. We always lost them. It was fun poking them through the black paper. We always ran out of paper though, so the thing would just be sitting there in the way.

Pound Puppies were sad little saps that were going to the pound to be put to death and you were supposed to save them! Geez! The pressure! Mom, dad! These puppies are going to die! Great marketing. I need to slap someone on the back for thinking that up.
Shrinky Dinks were...shit..what were they really? Some weird plastic? I don't even know. They were some plastic sheets that you cut out, put on a cookie sheet and baked, causing them to shrink. That makes about as much sense as silly putty, but both were a hit, so what do I know. After you shrank your dink (that doesn't sound right..) you could then make key chains and jewelry and stuff. I still have a ring I made. I will admit, it was pretty cool.
I liked Simon because I liked buttons. Any buttons I could push were always welcome. This game was another game for a lonely kid, sitting there with no family or friends. The computer would play simon says with you, you would feel like a loser, then you would go to bed and have Teddy Ruxpin read you a story. Maybe the Jetson's maid could make you breakfast in the morning.
Perfection always scared the crap out of me. My heart would start beating when that thing popped up. You had to put all the puzzle pieces in their slots before time was up. I loved the round piece right in the middle.
Speak & Spell was for the kid who had Teddy Ruxpin and Simon. It was a portable teacher, trying to get you to learn in your spare time when you should have been playing. Actually, we had the math one of these, so I don't even know what this one did. I just remember seeing a lot of them. My friends must have been retarded (kidding, kidding!)